“You’re not behind”

Recently I was driving home from the gym and also debating whether or not I should stop by the store to grab some ice cream. Self control won the internal decision making battle this time around. As I drove, I decided to roll the windows down- something people in Florida rarely do. To my surprise, it felt great. The air wasn’t too hot, the breeze felt incredible. Per usual, my music was turned all the way up filling my car with those cliched summer bops. Instead of laughing at movie moment I was creating for myself, something different came to mind: “wow young Michaela would’ve really loved this.”

When I was little all I could ever talk about was Palm Trees and summer. A little different for a girl growing up just outside of Seattle, Wa. A life of warmth and sunshine was something I had been dreaming of for a long time; feeling that amazing summer breeze while adventuring on my own. The idea of driving in Florida, with my windows down, listening to my favorite music was something my younger self would have always wanted to do. This was a moment that had weight, this was a big deal. It was a symbol that despite certain short comings, I am living a good life.

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As I have mentioned many times- it is easy to get caught up in the things we don’t have. So many times I have been blessed, I celebrate that for a short amount of time then stress about what I am still waiting on. This always comes and goes in waves, but I hate that I can let myself lean towards the negatives so much easier than the positives.

In that moment I had in the car, I could feel the Lord saying “child Michaela is really proud of you right now”. Then I realized- why shouldn’t I be proud of myself? Most of my life has been me feeling like I am chasing down this timeline that will never be mine- feeling like I am always behind everyone else. There are many things I wish I had but Jesus reminded me that I have my joy. This gift will always be a part of my past, present and future.

So to my friends who feel stuck, or feel behind: celebrate those small moments. The Lord May surprise you.